Tuesday 2 June 2015

End Of Second Year

So here I am typing this up on my last day of second year - crazy! With a number of mixed emotions right now I'm not sure I will be able to completely tell you how I am feeling. Firstly though I will say relief.
I started second year in a really positive place I think having such a long summer always makes me super motivated by the time we have to go back. I was so determined to get that first I'd been longing for and with a lot of had work it payed off. I excelled in my trends forecasting project which I talked about gender and the impact it has on fashion. 90 pages later I handed it in and after waiting 20 working days to get my grade I thought I would feel complete. Forever the pessimist I am always looking to make something perfect and the grade I am so grateful for yet I couldn't help but think to myself 'What now?'. It wasn't enough, there is always something more I could've done or added in or changed slightly. I'm aware that I should've just enjoyed the moment rather that beating myself up about the little things but that is just my personality.

It was challenging at points so much stress, tears and 'lets just give up' moments yet I'm sat here handing in my final project (international retailing) for the year and I feel proud I did it. I really get it when people say uni is the best time of your life. I can't even tell you how many things I've learnt on my journey and it's not even over yet. There are up and down moments to everything it's just one of those things in life but the ups beat the down moments hands down. 

I'm worried about what is ahead of me. When I think how quickly second year has gone I'm fully aware of how much third year will fly. Then that's it for me no more education - so strange (well, at least I don't think so anyway). Then everyone will start the whole 'the world is your oyster' speech and I'm sure the panic of having to get a real full time job will set in. I don't know what the future holds for me as I'm still finding my feet but theres hope that one day this will all be worth it and I'll come out a better, well rounded person.

I know this all sounds a bit doom and gloom but the last project was really hard for me and completely knocked my confidence. I won't get those results for a while now but I have just never felt so unsure on a project in my time at uni and I think it pushed me to the edge of what I though I was capable of. In a way it's good but you either do amazing and surprise yourself or well you don't do so good. I am hoping it's the first choice, pray for me guys!

Do any of you go to uni? Let me know your experience in the comments!

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